I know it's not even Christmas yet, but I am already thinking of my new year's resolutions. I have been dealing with a lot of issues this holiday season. Most of them having to do with money - or my lack thereof. It has been a struggle, but it's all for a good cause. I haven't worked much since my baby girl was born in April. Mostly it's because I have been going to school full-time, and when you factor in school, kids, and a job - there's not much time for everything. So, working full-time was the one that had to give. I do, however have a part-part-time job at an after school program, which I love, but because of the sparse hours, it means not much money. So, this Christmas season I have been especially aware of how little we have by way of finances. There was a point a few weeks ago when I didn't think my husband and I would be able to buy any presents for our kids. We did come into some extra cash, and were able to pick up some things for them. So, no worries.
But I digress. Due to the lack of money, I've been thinking a lot about how distorted our views on Christmas has become. I of course want my kids to have whatever their little hearts desire, but I also want to instill in them a sense of giving and wonder at the real meaning behind this holiday. I know they are still very young, probably too young to understand that there are little kids who have much less than they do and are lucky to have enough to eat, let alone toys to play with. I, on the other hand, am plenty old enough to realize how lucky I really am. Sure, I don't have pretty new clothes, the ability to take long trips, or even a house of my own. I DO however have plenty of nice clothes - even if they are a few years old; three vehicles to drive my family around in - even if one of them is 16 years old; and wonderful in-laws who have opened their home to us while we try to save money for our own place.
This brings me to my resolutions. On top of the usual losing weight, and maintaining a budget - blah, blah, blah - I have decided that instead of dwelling on what I don't have, I need to start focusing on what I do have. Oftentimes I get discouraged and envious and wish I had the ability to go out and buy whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I find though, that when I focus on only money, I lose sight of all the wonderful blessings I have every single day of my life. So, I am resolving to find one thing every single day to be thankful for. Some days it does seem daunting to come up with 365 different things to be grateful for. But, I think that when I start I will be pleasantly surprised at what God has blessed me with. Plus, by focusing on what I have, and not what I don't have I can learn to carry a grateful heart through every aspect of my life. And a thankful heart is a happy heart. I hope that by having a thankful heart I can teach my kids to have thankful hearts as well. By instilling a sense of gratitude in them now, they can carry that throughout their lives and hopefully never take for granted every single blessing God brings to them. And that is something that will mean much more than anything I could ever buy them.
